To have or not to have that is the question!
This was never really a question for me. I have known since I was a little girl playing with dolls that I would like to have a child someday. Now that I have a son, he is the light of my life and I could not imagine life without him now. He is 16 months old and everyone is pressuring for another baby. I however am not sure that I am so convinced. I am not sure that I want another baby. I myself did grow up with an older brother and love it and hated it at times but overall I think that it is good to have siblings (that is another subject all together).
I do work in a large corporation where many of the women have chosen to not reproduce. This is largely in part to the fact that they are more career oriented. This is fine for them but I am just working to live not living to work. They are also a handful of women that would have liked to have children but are not able for one reason or another. This could go into all the different reasons why they did not have children but some of the reasons are very personal and lots of women do not like to talk about it because they feel somehow that it is flaw within them. This is not true at all but the few that I have talked to feel this way—it is very disheartening.
This just goes to show you that children truly are a blessing and a miracle
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5 comments:
You are so right…children are a blessing and for sure a miracle. When I was young I questioned those women who made the choice to remain childless. Unlike today when a successful career is seen as a positive choice for a woman to make, those women, 30 years ago, were scorned. It is good that you can be in the thick of it in your own career and still see so clearly the intentions of your co-workers. I do believe, after raising my children and finding out, up close and personal, what motherhood and parenting really means in commitment and sacrifice, that it is not for everyone. These women should have the choice.
Now, on the other hand, procreation needs to happen, responsibly of course, yet extinction could be a very scary thing to consider! There was a group of scholars back in history, that tried to proliferate their culture by adding adult members only. No pregnancies were allowed and everyone was sterilized. I do not think that will happen however it is worth contemplation as more and more woman do say no to having children. It is ashamed that men cannot get pregnant and share the burden!
Bearing children is much like many of the choices we make each day…we are all very different and our world allows us to maximize those differences with our choices - in all that we do in our life. Imagine if we all chose steak and no one wanted chicken – or if everyone wanted to be the boss and no one would take on the role of the worker.
So glad you chose to be a mother….I promise you will never regret it…and it will not be boring.
I do feel children are a blessing to have. Someday I do want to have children and I hope there isn't anything stopping me from getting that accomplish. I feel children can make your day be brighter if you were to ever have a bad day at work or school.So children are one day apart of my dreams that goes along with my career and husband.
My blessing is eighteen years old and graduating in May. I am one of those women that always wanted a child. It wasn't a little girl, I always had my heart set on a boy. I promise your son will bring you the most joy throughout your life. Many of my friends told me my son would be closer to his dad. However, it is not true. I have an exceptional young man that helped me through breast cancer treatment better than his father. I want you to enjoy every minute because you will close your eyes and next he will be eighteen and leaving home.
Your opinions and decisions have obviously worked well for you so far, which is great. I believe that women often make their decisions in life and reproduction based on tradition or the way it has always been done, etc. Family pressure (especially mothers) can influence how many children you have (as you seem to be experiencing right now). Whether a couple has children or not is their choice, not society's or any individual. What I believe is that (and I am sure a lot of people will disagree) this choice MUST be made BEFORE conception, not afterward. If you "play the game" you take your chances and pay the consequences, in my opinion. I become a bit confused by women who like to claim they have control over their bodies by "playing the game", and then "taking care of it afterward." In my view of things by the time they are taking care of it, there is already a joining of sperm and egg, so there is life there. I am very understanding of women who choose not to have children, because they choose instead to concentrate on work or something else. But feel that choice should be made using preventative measures and not abortion as birth control.
I understand that it is hard to have children and hold a career at the same time because those children tend to miss out on that parent to child time that is necessary in raising a child. I personally don't want to have more than two kids because being a physician involves long hours and hard work and juggling kids into that schedule will be very difficult.
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